i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
It's blow job season.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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