and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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