honey bunches of taint.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
