Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
