I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize