bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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