that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
