She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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