We're facebook friends in real life
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
