he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
