Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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