Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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