We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
