I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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