It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize