is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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