Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
