ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Randomize