how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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