Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
