I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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