then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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