I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize