I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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