did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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