you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Randomize
