I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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