He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
