ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
