I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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