People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
