oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
