I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
