I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
