Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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