It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize