Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
