That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
