meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
