i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
this will be a night to untag.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
