Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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