haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
