he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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