My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
