I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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