I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
