How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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