walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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