its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
