Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
