some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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