Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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